Hey, Courtney Sanders here with another episode of Think and Grow Chick Podcast. Today we’re going to talk about why it is not working. We all get super frustrated when we set out to accomplish a particular goal or achieve something in our business or even, start a certain workout plan or maybe trying to get back on the dating scene.
And I wanted to do this podcast because I found myself giving the same advice or giving the same reasons why. But in giving them those reasons, I realized that the reasons why it’s not working in your business really translate to the reasons why it’s not working in any arena.
So to that diet or fitness plan or that dating plan or career plan or finance plan or whatever result that you set out for yourself that you’re not getting in your life and you’re like, “Why is this not working? I am doing all the things and it’s not working.” I find that it’s usually because of one of these five reasons.
So listen to the podcast here to know what these five reasons are that no one is telling you.
For the full audio, please check out the podcast on iTunes and Soundcloud.
Notes from the Podcast:
- You’re not listening to your life.
The first reason why it’s not working is that you’re not listening to your life. Now, what do I mean by you’re not listening to your life? I got this concept from Oprah when I attended one of her events in Houston. In one of the sessions, she said something I’ll never forget. She said something to the effect of if you’re trying to figure out what you should be doing, it’s in the thread of all the experiences of your life.
Look at your life as a tapestry with all those threads that link and hold them together. If you don’t know what your purpose is or you don’t know what you’re supposed to be doing, look at the threads. It’ll be that thread that has been throughout your life.
A lot of people are not listening to their lives. I believe that we are always called to do certain things in a particular area. So it might not be working because either you are trying to do something that you’re not really called for, or you’re not doing it in the way you’re called to do it as evidenced by your life.
So look at yourself and at your experiences, the way things have come together, with things that you’ve always done best, and the way things haven’t always worked out for you. Ask yourself, are you listening to your life and heeding that advice? If you haven’t discovered it yet, it will be evidenced in the thread of your life.
Start paying attention. Trust yourself more. It’s not always true that you don’t have a clue as to what you should be doing, or what your purpose is. A lot of times you DO know, you just don’t know how you know. Because we’re always seeking externally, looking to experts to validate us and to give us information, oftentimes we have a lack of self-trust.
Carrying that lack of self-trust with us, we get into the habit of not listening to ourselves and not listening to our lives. If you have looked into the patterns that were happening in your life and the results it gave you, you would have gotten an indication a long time ago.
Your life gives you hints in different patterns. You were just not listening. There’s a difference between not knowing and not listening. As Oprah said, look at the thread that connects all the experiences of your life in order to figure out what you should be doing. You can look at that same thread to figure out why it’s not working.
Do not ignore that thread that connects all your experiences because it will tell you the direction you need to be operating in. A lot of times we’re just forcing something that’s not working because it’s not meant for us.
2. You are majoring in minors.
I see this all the time in business but it’s applicable elsewhere. If I had a dollar for every time somebody asked me something where it’s like, should I do this or should I do that, while simultaneously missing the bigger picture, I would be rich.
The answer to all those little questions is, it doesn’t matter. It doesn’t matter because the results that you’re looking for can be achieved either or. There’s a bigger picture that you need to follow. The questions you should be asking is “Are you unique?”
Are you attractive to your target market? Is this something that they’re gonna be interested in? Is this a product that they’re willing to buy? Do you come across reputable and credible and like somebody that they want to spend money with? These are the questions that you need to be asking yourself.
This is what I mean about majoring in minors.
A lot of times we get so focused on the minutiae that we’re not really focusing on the broader picture that really is going to make a difference. Focus on the bigger picture at hand. It might not be working because you’re majoring in minors and not on the big picture.
3. You’re trying to follow a system
I’ve been harping on this lately because we are at a fever pitch right now especially in the business world where people are trying to systemize their way to success. I’m not talking about the business systems you use to run your business like a VA System, but the internal systems you run your business on.
This stuff does not work. There are principles that are helpful, general success principles that tend to do work for every business or career. But for the most part, systems don’t work because the people selling you the system came up with it by looking at their own situation. They crafted it to best serve themselves and that’s why it worked for them.
What worked for one may not work for you. That’s why systems rarely are transferable. What’s better than following a system is looking at yourself , at your unique situation. Craft your own system, your own formula based on what you think is going to work from your vantage point with the situation you’re in and resources available to you.
You can model. Modeling is different from copying or trying to find a system. It is looking basically how other people created their own systems for themselves and then using that as guidance in order to create your own system that’s going to work for you.
Sometimes systems work if your situation is similar to that person. But if it’s not working, it is because you were trying to follow a particular system religiously. You need to step outside of yourself and not be afraid to customize your own situations.
Trust yourself. You can create your own system. You can seek out others for guidance, but you should be able to assess your own situation and come up with something. If it isn’t working, try letting the system go.
4. You don’t have your own point of view.
I’ve been harping on uniqueness. At the end of the day, people are attracted to those who have a unique perspective on the world, who have something unique to say, have something unique to bring to the table.
When you go to meetings, are you saying something new? Are you saying something different? Do you have a fresh outlook on the problems that your company is facing? Do you have unique ideas to bring to your boss? In business, if you were in a crowded marketplace, there’s a lot of people doing it, you got to be either saying something new or saying something old in a new way.
Ask yourself, do you have a unique point of view and are you bringing that to the table? If not, that’s probably why it’s not working.
5. You’re not climbing up the Prosperity Pyramid.
What is a Prosperity Pyramid? It’s a model that I’ve come up with, and I’ve just named it the Prosperity Pyramid after realizing a lot of people are failing in this area. It’s a simple pyramid. It’s just three levels. There’s a base, a middle part, and top part. Now in order to be ultimately successful, you want to climb to the very peak of that pyramid to the top part. But a lot of people don’t make it up all the way the Prosperity Pyramid because they don’t pass through all the levels.
Levels of the Prosperity Pyramid
1.Base – Skills
These are the things that you know how to do because you’ve taught yourself how to do them, you’ve cultivated them over time, you have learned them. These are not bad things to have, but then you will find yourself not having a level of success and could be frustrating because you are only operating in your skills.
2.Middle – Gifts
These are the things that you are graced to do. You are born naturally with these abilities. These are your talents, God-given gifts, and you know you didn’t really do anything for them. You’re just a natural at it.
Once you marry those skills with your gifts, you’ll find that you tend to be a little more prosperous and a little more successful. But I say a little more prosperous and a little more successful because most people stop at the level of their gifts.
People who are operating in their skills and their gifts still feel some level of frustration because they’re not at the top of that pyramid. They’re not yet at the peak.
3.Top – Calling
This is what you are called to do. Everybody talks about their gifts and talents, what they know and what they’re good at but few people are willing to marry those things with what they are called to do. And that is because a lot of times we have our own ideas about what we want to do. It could be a possibility that you are chasing something.
You are trying to achieve something that you are not called to do and not called to have. Your skills, gifts may be directed at the wrong calling. You could be barking at the wrong tree, trying to enter a path that you know is not your calling. Make sure that you are climbing to the top of the Prosperity Pyramid. Because if you are doing something outside of your calling, it will never work, as flawlessly as you would hope that it would work. There will always be some level of friction.
So yes, you got to have the skills, the gifts, but you also have to have the calling. And so maybe you’re doing something either that you’re not called to do or you’re doing it in a way that you’re not called to do it, and that’s why it’s not working.